how (heavily) pregnant women smoke. i just don't get it...is carrying a child inside of you not a good enough reason to STOP smoking? not doing just for yourself but for the health of your unborn baby? it appalls me this selfishness and stupidity of some women. shame on you!
my week's flown by (yet again).. i have no idea where all this time is passing by?! i'm so busy with uni i tend to go to bed between 1 and 2am..i'm shattered. so tonight, i'm hopping into bed straight after this! the earliest i've ever been since i left L's!!
talking of Mr L.. i keep wondering where he is, what he's doing, if he's happy, if he's tired, if he misses me...
i can't wait till he gets back.
i also guess this is some kind of 'taster' for what it will be like when he leaves for Afghan.. which i am actually dreading. look at me now - i'm lucky he's gone for only a week..what will i do when he'll be gone for 6 months? i don't even want to think about it...
i want to go to poland. i miss my parents and my friends. i wish i could have had more time i went during the summer to see you... :(
xoxo
Thursday, September 30, 2010
eat. pray. love.
yes, maria went to the cinema today.. how could i resist? two for one. you know me, always the opportunist (especially of it means getting away from vapid work for uni!) only if it is for and hour or two, it helps me clear my mind and refocus on life in general.
i saw a chick-flick, there's no other way of describing this film. even though it may not have been a really life changing film, it made me think about how i perceive myself and my life..i've never had a period in my lifetime when i 'got in touch with myself'. i'd (similarly to the main character) always been either breaking up or getting with someone, i'd never had that stage when you'd try and be happy with yourself.. i think i've missed that part out because it makes me feel uncomfortable. i'm marvelously happy in the relationship that i am now, although recently, well, a few days ago, we went through a heartbreakingly serious rough patch, that made me think how much do i love myself? do i love myself enough to love someone else? do you know what i mean?? i am so content with Mr L but i truly believe and think (and know) he needs more, and i'm not able to give it to him because i don't fully love me. i need to reach the level of loving me to be absolutely devoted to someone else. i will use my time wisely and i have devised a plan, an 'action plan' that from this day forward, i will start loving myself, my body and everything related to my being.
wow, all that from 'just a film'..it's great to go to the cinema from time to time - reflection is good :) i hope you are all happy with yourselves so that you can be the happiest with your loved ones.
xoxo
i saw a chick-flick, there's no other way of describing this film. even though it may not have been a really life changing film, it made me think about how i perceive myself and my life..i've never had a period in my lifetime when i 'got in touch with myself'. i'd (similarly to the main character) always been either breaking up or getting with someone, i'd never had that stage when you'd try and be happy with yourself.. i think i've missed that part out because it makes me feel uncomfortable. i'm marvelously happy in the relationship that i am now, although recently, well, a few days ago, we went through a heartbreakingly serious rough patch, that made me think how much do i love myself? do i love myself enough to love someone else? do you know what i mean?? i am so content with Mr L but i truly believe and think (and know) he needs more, and i'm not able to give it to him because i don't fully love me. i need to reach the level of loving me to be absolutely devoted to someone else. i will use my time wisely and i have devised a plan, an 'action plan' that from this day forward, i will start loving myself, my body and everything related to my being.
wow, all that from 'just a film'..it's great to go to the cinema from time to time - reflection is good :) i hope you are all happy with yourselves so that you can be the happiest with your loved ones.
xoxo
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
yesterday...
I write to you from my room.. YES, but no internet – I’m just writing this in word and posting it up on my blog. Oh, the good ol’ days of not having the internet – I HATE IT. Can’t wait till Tuesday!! Virgin internet here I wait…
So I’ve done a week of induction at uni (which was fab) if only it lasted forever…hey ho, I’ve also managed to survive a whole week of ‘proper’ uni – soooo much work. So much stuff to do, so many things to print, so much information to take in, so many essays to write, so many hours of researching to do, so many trips to the library to be done, so many subjects to acquire, so many notes to be taken down, so many presentations to be done, so many books to read, so little sleep – welcome to PGCE course. I have a hate/love relationship with it. I love it because I’ve met such wonderful people here; I look forward to my school experience and getting my QTS. But, I hate it because there’s so much work to do.. information overload every single day. We get tons of essays and projects to do..i’m kind of (not) looking forward to it..? I have mixed feelings about it all. I’m so glad to be on this course though. At times it will be fun but the majority of the time it’s work work work.
I’m living with a really nice girl in her flat. I have the whole bedroom to myself :) it’s a bit on the empty side, but soon enough, I shall make it my own! I just need to get a desk lamp, chest of drawers/storage cabinet and get some more pictures on the wall and it will be fab. The location is brilliant – 15mins walk to uni, not bad for London, the price is affordable (def for London) and my flatmate is really cool. We even went to the British museum on Saturday and had a blast in the Egyptian section! I’m so happy to be here, but I think, next year it’ll be time to go up north and start living there with Mr L :)
The weather here has been absolutely horrible the past few days – windy and rainy. Your typical English weather – what more could you ask for? I’ve had to buy myself boots (where else but from ‘new look’ they have 20% student’s discount – woohoo!) I’ve bought some lovely nail polish too – by BarryM the colour is called ‘mushroom’ and is a lovely shade of brown.. def a wonderful autumn nail colour. I’m pondering on getting h&m ‘oversized boyfriend shirts’. I adore the look of them, I even tried some on and was ferociously tempted to get them but I thought I’d wait a day or two to see if I still liked them as much as I did first time round.. we’ll see how it goes ;) besides I don’t want to be spending too much money seeing that I don’t really have any :/
Hope you’re all doing well, I can’t wait to have my internet and I’ll FINALLY be able to write every day :D
xoxo
So I’ve done a week of induction at uni (which was fab) if only it lasted forever…hey ho, I’ve also managed to survive a whole week of ‘proper’ uni – soooo much work. So much stuff to do, so many things to print, so much information to take in, so many essays to write, so many hours of researching to do, so many trips to the library to be done, so many subjects to acquire, so many notes to be taken down, so many presentations to be done, so many books to read, so little sleep – welcome to PGCE course. I have a hate/love relationship with it. I love it because I’ve met such wonderful people here; I look forward to my school experience and getting my QTS. But, I hate it because there’s so much work to do.. information overload every single day. We get tons of essays and projects to do..i’m kind of (not) looking forward to it..? I have mixed feelings about it all. I’m so glad to be on this course though. At times it will be fun but the majority of the time it’s work work work.
I’m living with a really nice girl in her flat. I have the whole bedroom to myself :) it’s a bit on the empty side, but soon enough, I shall make it my own! I just need to get a desk lamp, chest of drawers/storage cabinet and get some more pictures on the wall and it will be fab. The location is brilliant – 15mins walk to uni, not bad for London, the price is affordable (def for London) and my flatmate is really cool. We even went to the British museum on Saturday and had a blast in the Egyptian section! I’m so happy to be here, but I think, next year it’ll be time to go up north and start living there with Mr L :)
The weather here has been absolutely horrible the past few days – windy and rainy. Your typical English weather – what more could you ask for? I’ve had to buy myself boots (where else but from ‘new look’ they have 20% student’s discount – woohoo!) I’ve bought some lovely nail polish too – by BarryM the colour is called ‘mushroom’ and is a lovely shade of brown.. def a wonderful autumn nail colour. I’m pondering on getting h&m ‘oversized boyfriend shirts’. I adore the look of them, I even tried some on and was ferociously tempted to get them but I thought I’d wait a day or two to see if I still liked them as much as I did first time round.. we’ll see how it goes ;) besides I don’t want to be spending too much money seeing that I don’t really have any :/
Hope you’re all doing well, I can’t wait to have my internet and I’ll FINALLY be able to write every day :D
xoxo
Saturday, September 11, 2010
sitting back and waiting
i viewed a room today, not far from uni, and i told the girl 'I WANT IT!!'..so it looks as if i might have just found my room!! thing is she still has a few people in for viewings today :/ so i have to wait and see...as per usual..
please please please..let me seal the deal.
i've had enough of people being so uncertain and flimsy in their decision-making.
I WANT THIS ROOM!
please please please..let me seal the deal.
i've had enough of people being so uncertain and flimsy in their decision-making.
I WANT THIS ROOM!
Friday, September 10, 2010
'the time traveller's wife'
on a more (what would seem) a happier note, i finished reading my ever-so-wonderful book! i couldn't put it down, it was one of those books that you just keeping reading and reading until, all of a sudden.. you've finished it!
what a brilliantly written book, the plot is immense and utterly gripping, the whole story is so tricky, so intricate and so full of love and passion..it seems like one of those things that you'd love to happen to yourself! i was captivated from the very start. i hadn't seen the film and my sister had bought the book for me as a present (thank you!). the ending is swift yet painful, truly gripping and heart-breakingly tragic with a hint of optimism. words cannot explain how this book made me feel. and yes, i did shed a tear or two or maybe even over a dozen when i got to the final pages.
what a wonderful read. i love literature that is so pure and emotionally thrilling.
what a brilliantly written book, the plot is immense and utterly gripping, the whole story is so tricky, so intricate and so full of love and passion..it seems like one of those things that you'd love to happen to yourself! i was captivated from the very start. i hadn't seen the film and my sister had bought the book for me as a present (thank you!). the ending is swift yet painful, truly gripping and heart-breakingly tragic with a hint of optimism. words cannot explain how this book made me feel. and yes, i did shed a tear or two or maybe even over a dozen when i got to the final pages.
what a wonderful read. i love literature that is so pure and emotionally thrilling.
give me strength
it's been nearly a week and i've been sat in front of a computer screen for nearly all that time, searching, looking, ringing and hoping.
to no avail.
i'm still stuck. still room-less. still stressed. still wanting to have my own bit of space, yet no one is willing to give me a firm 'YES'. it's hard and i let it get to me today. i melted but L managed to scrape me off the floor offering me some over-the-phone love and advice. scrambling to my feet i approach the computer once again and search, look, ring and hope.
the vicious circle seems to have no end.
to no avail.
i'm still stuck. still room-less. still stressed. still wanting to have my own bit of space, yet no one is willing to give me a firm 'YES'. it's hard and i let it get to me today. i melted but L managed to scrape me off the floor offering me some over-the-phone love and advice. scrambling to my feet i approach the computer once again and search, look, ring and hope.
the vicious circle seems to have no end.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
on your marks, get set....
and tomorrow it's 'GO'!
i've managed to pack all my paper work that i might possibly need for Uni in London. It's terribly hard packing all the essentials..i've been here for some time now and I really don't want to go. I've been putting off packing for quite a while, and now that it's finally dawning upon me that I really do have to go, I'm uneasy, unwilling and utterly slow at getting my things ready. Plus I'm limited as to what and how much I can take as I'll be taking a train down to London.
The garden is looking so pretty now, we've managed to get our garden set out onto the decking. Next summer we're planning on getting the barbecue done and have friends and family come over for a barbi!
We've also got our dining table and chairs in the house too, and we're ever so thrilled about it! It's wonderful and suits us so much! I'll be so sad to have to go to a room in London and not have the comfort of my own living room, kitchen and lounge area with a tv :( oh, how I wish I could stay..
But, this PGCE has to be done and it's better to get it done now rather than a few years down the line. I'd rather spend this year living off beans on toast than doing nothing with my career. I can't wait to get this qualification done!
Finally, I have bought myself a laptop so I will constantly be online ;) no more excuses that I don't have a computer or the internet.
Welcome to a new chapter in my life..one that you are all invited to!!
xoxo
i've managed to pack all my paper work that i might possibly need for Uni in London. It's terribly hard packing all the essentials..i've been here for some time now and I really don't want to go. I've been putting off packing for quite a while, and now that it's finally dawning upon me that I really do have to go, I'm uneasy, unwilling and utterly slow at getting my things ready. Plus I'm limited as to what and how much I can take as I'll be taking a train down to London.
The garden is looking so pretty now, we've managed to get our garden set out onto the decking. Next summer we're planning on getting the barbecue done and have friends and family come over for a barbi!
We've also got our dining table and chairs in the house too, and we're ever so thrilled about it! It's wonderful and suits us so much! I'll be so sad to have to go to a room in London and not have the comfort of my own living room, kitchen and lounge area with a tv :( oh, how I wish I could stay..
But, this PGCE has to be done and it's better to get it done now rather than a few years down the line. I'd rather spend this year living off beans on toast than doing nothing with my career. I can't wait to get this qualification done!
Finally, I have bought myself a laptop so I will constantly be online ;) no more excuses that I don't have a computer or the internet.
Welcome to a new chapter in my life..one that you are all invited to!!
xoxo
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