i've decided to write an update as my life has been pretty much hectic.
i have a job, i work at a super fun bar in west brompton, the bar staff are amazing, i love all of them to bits, they make working there worthwhile, so do the customers (but not that there are many...mostly regulars who spend hours talking to you if you're in the mood).
i live in a rented room with a polish woman who is old. she's home 24/7 but doesnt mind me coming home way past midnight (sometimes even later when i decide i want to ''hang out''at *someone's* for a bit). i cook my own food, i do my own washing, i sleep in a double bed - i'm content.
work brings in shit money. but it lets me survive somehow bu like i said, i cannot save anything as i earn so little its shameful :( i hope that september will be a rebound and i'll pick up on a few teaching jobs that i've applied for.
but the main reason of my post was to talk about men.
how confusing the little beings can be.
as it has been for a long time now, there are two men who count most for me: L & D
i thought i'd write about it here but i think it's not the right place to be doing so. they both take the most important place in my heart. but one is closer one is further. and i dont know if i should settle for what is easier. i know many would say no, but it is so difficult knowing that L is so far and i'd be getting myself into a lot of trouble again if i fell for him, i know i cant do long distance ever again. and as for d, well..i think he's still deliberating what he wants from life and so he cannot let me in just yet, but seeing how things are going, we're both on the right tracks.
its good to know you have people around you who love you. i have a job, i have two men who adore me, i have my parents and i am in london. i'm happy. and i'd be even happier if i sorted out my love life once and for all ;)
xxx
